StaRRy

wahhh... new blogskin ... so starry..... hahhaa... i love stars.. 5 sharp edges... intimidating.. yet, at the same time, beautiful. stars are motivating... i wanna be a star in everything tt i do. a shiny shiny little star. lol ~ i knw when im tired, i'll talk nonsense.

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1am plus.. and i havent bath yet. i can see myself suffering frm reuthmatism 10 yrs down the road.

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last fri... had the worse day since work started. don know y, suddenly felt v demoralised. mundane job, limited job scope, limited personal growth/development, no sense of belonging, no feel of being welcomed by colleagues, no room to learn things tt i tink im capable of. so wad if i work in a reputable bank? so wad if my designation is senior officer? so wad if my pay is able to meet my expectation? so wad if i can knock off on the dot? all juz look nice on the surface... but inside... oh..

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actually, there's nthing wrong with the job. juz tt i think it's too easy. doesnt really add to my resume.not much job satisfaction. tt's the one and only concern. i guess things are always greener on the other side of the hill. if it's tough work and long hours, i'll complain. if it's low pay, i'll complain. now i cannot learn much, i also complain. i knw i should be contented and thankful. im well-paid by doing a simple job. i shld be v happy, shldn't i? but.. human beings r jux weird. or maybe, it's juz me. but then, im always thankful de leii.. but this time round, when it comes to job issues... somehow, i don know wad r the things tt can really satisfy me. i also dont really know wad i wanna in a job. is it the money? the job satisfaction? the prestige? the learning opportunities? the amt of stress? the amt of working hours? the ans is: to strike an optimal in all. but am i soo lucky enuff to find a job tt can give me optimal amt of all these factors?

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whatever it is,i definitely will not quit now. only a loser will give up only after 2 wks. hahaha... once, i was such a loser. went work for 1 day only and quitted. jc1, if i remembered clearly, at tiong bahru's giftland. lol~ soo young and hot and implusive. nw cannot so impulsive liao. watever happens, also must tahan at least till yr-end. and if i can make it to yr-end, i believe i will make it to march next yr... by then alr 6 mths, hopefully can be confirmed and have a share in the bonus. wahhahhaah...

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nw i'll juz sit ard and learn wad im suppose to learn. i'll do my best. if after a few months, still cannot make it, then we'll c how. rite now, i shld be open and positive. it's only the 2nd week. relax man. everything takes time. don worry unduly. u neber know wad will happen.

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see? i juz knew im gd in self-physcoing.

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alrite.. time to bath.. and it's 1.42am. omg~