previously i felt like a sperm -- busy swimming with millions of other sperms, but only one of us will get in and fertilise the egg. now, i feel like a french fry -- a small piece of potatoe waiting to be dump into the big pot of hot sizzling oil to be fried.
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tmr will be the long-awaited day. i know it's gonna be tough. somehow, i have a bad feeling. a feeling tt i'll be v miserable and unhappy. don ask me why cuz i don know. i juz hope this feeling is due to anxiety and nervousness and it's juz illusionary.
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somehow, this time, im not as relax as tt time when i tot i was going to start on the tuition centre. tt time i was all ready and looking forward. but this time, i juz feel v sian and unhappy. i think the zeal in starting on a new job's long gone. waited too long till it's all gone already. or maybe, i had conveniently sterotyped the banking environment as stressful and full of politics. how i hope i can part-time forever. no heavy responsibilities, no one bothers to involve me in their politics, no need for meetings, no need for reports, happy-go-lucky everyday. but i know, all of us must grow up one day. and tmr will be that day when a new chapter of my life starts. im a grown up. i must go out into the society and shoulder the responsibilities. i must step out of my comfort zone. i must face it. i must conquer it. i know it's tough but i know i can do it because if everyone else can, y cant i?
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the job... i cant say it's something tt i really wanna do. maybe tt's another reason as to y im so reluctant and unhappy. but, i am already at this step. wad else can i do except to go ahead? ntu is still sending us emails on employers recruiting grads and there r jobs which im really interested in. but i cant take actions, can i? perhaps, i should have waited and not rush into things. now tt im at this stage, whatever i say is of no use. tmr, i'll still have to start.
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again, some psychological preparations. i need them more than ever.
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1- whatever happens, stay calm and do not take it too personal. DO NOT let pple or things ard u affect you too much!
2- nothing will be easy and beginning will always be hard. Trust that things will only get better.
3- time flies! b4 u know it, u have already adapt to everything and ur pay is ever increasing!
4- be nice to pple. even to those who r nasty to u.
5- but if pple wants to play evil, then show them who can be more evil.
6- don lose temper or lose control! u have grown up and should be in full control of ur emotions. DO NOT display ur negative emotions too much.
7- do ur best. make the best out of everything. even if they ask u to do crap, believe tt u still can learn something out of doing crap.
8- 忍,忍,忍, 百忍能成金!
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jiayou huiping, u can do it and u will do it! and tmr's the 1st day of the lunar seventh month.. wahhhh.....
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finally purchase the sammi cheng's concert tix! woohoO! there goes my $168 + $2 sistic svc charge. but in return, we got free movie tix for Gone Shopping starring kym ng and adrain pang. errmmm.. i don wanna comment, but i wont recommend the show. yepp.. watch at ur own risk. wahh.. so qiao.. now 933 playing sammi's song! hehehhe... 13th oct.. looking 4ward!
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ok..all the best tmr!
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