It's SettLeD

woo... it's finally settled! i signed the contract le! hmm.. it's like a big load off. finally i got a job le. finally i can get started le! yeahhhh!! hmm.. need to do some physcological preparation now. hmm... huiping.. pls remember that:

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1) if u wanna earn pple's money, be prepared to 受人家的气.

2) it will be tough at the beginning cuz everything's new and u know nothing. it's inevitable and okay to be fearful and miserable. tahan this period. eventually u'll find everything okay. it takes time.

3) some pple mite not be so friendly but tt's cuz u all r not 熟. don be offended. give urself time to know other pple and give other pple time to know u. u'll soon learnt tt everybody's nice ard u.

4) take everything in a positive manner. even if they ask u to do "sai-kang" (shit job)... tell urself tt u'll still learn something out of it. don 埋怨 or be unhappy or feel unjust.

5) even if ur really unhappy, neber show it !!

6) everything must 忍 !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

7) if really unhappy, think of the money tt u'll be receiving at the end of the month. tt will make u feel better.

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yepp.. it's my 1st job. hmm... don know how to describe lei.. haha.. finally stepping into this working society. after studying for so so so long.... this day is finally here. hmm.. weird feeling la.

my contract. cannot disclose the clauses though... thanks to all whom i consulted regarding the issues on contract.. lol.. i 1st-timer lar.. must know wad im entitled to and wad should be stated n wad not. cannot blur blur.. later kenna cheated also donnoe..

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9th july. im looking forward. i hope this enthusiasm will still be there after i start work. i hope everything will be fine. but then, i also know tt it's quite tough to stay long on the 1st job. somehow, for "beginnings", it's the norm to job hop a few times b4 really settling down. see how ba.. no point thinking so much now..

tt's my "uniform".. haha.. no lar.. gotta wear on weekends only. but abit weird lo.. collar tee doesnt go with knee-length skirts or long pants lorr.. but anyway, everybody will be wearing.. sui bian lorr.. actually also gd la.. then i no need buy so many tops. hmm.. now i need shoes n bags. shoes must be at least one inch tall. mm.. thinking of going jb tmr.. but... dangerous horr? hmm..

alrite. the door's opened. i've come to the 1st station. let's see wad's gonna happen @ this 1st station. ***pray***

i hope all will go well :)

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wad happened to my chatbox?????? omg.. don tell me it's gone! arghh... how huh??? 1st it was the counter.. now the chatbox.. wad the..

KTV

today took full day leave cuz later going to sign contract and i wanna plan some schedules and settle some issues on hand 1st b4 signing the contract. and so now free to blog. really miss times like this where i can juz slack n relax n nua - whole day do nothing but surf net, blog, watch tv, slp, eat.. the worse part is only to mop floor and tidy house for ma -- .. haii.. but i guess... i wont be having such nua times anymore. back to this issue later.

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yesterday after work met up with hubb. had dinner @ the hk cafe @ cineleisure. and then hubb suggested singing ktv which is a fab idea! been sooo long since i last sang ktv with him. usu we sing k-lunch on sat cuz it's cheap n got meals to eat. but now sat he has tuition and im too lazy to go out soo early, so we havent been singing for a while. yesterday finally got a chance! though abit ex.. in fact, much more ex than k-lunch, but we still went ahead. the time was simply not enuff! so many songs i wanna sing!! the time was supposed to run frm 7-10pm.. but we entered at 7.40pm. luki 40 mins... boo

hubb said he looked cute in this pic.. never capture such cute look b4.. wah.. bhb lorr..

these food.... remind me of hk again.. haii

big french toast. yum!

garfield! hubb bought for me when he went jb with his frens for seafood treat.thx hubb.keep up the gd work! i think hubb looks like garfield.. tt sleepy eye....and being fat n lazy!! lol... and... he's such a poser.. always being the extra!! 抢镜头 is his forte.. ok.. he's gonna kill me when he reads this....

in the ktv rm. i realised kbox rm really super small. and yesterday our rm was rite beside the counter where the staff will stand ... diao.. super sian.. shld have requested for a change of room.

ahh... garfield's singing for me???

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later im going to sign the contract le. though im still having some doubts, but i've decided to go ahead. i've tot carefully and these r the reasons for going ahead:
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1) ok job - the job gives me an impression of not being so boring and mundane although i mite be totally wrong. but dont try how would u know, rite? anyway, no job's easy. "be ready to take hardship if u wanna earn pple's money", that's a fact i knew long ago. there's a career path and the starting pay's good. and the benefits are gd too. so y not?

2) nice pple - frm the interviewers to the hr personnel who discussed the contract with me tt day.. i think they r nice pple. the kind of pple i wont feel stress working with. and.. i can feel their sincerity. but it may all be a hoax too. a hoax to trap me to join them in hell! but again, don try, how u know?

3) no bond - there's no bond. jus a one month notice if i wanna quit. so if im unhappy or there r better offers on the way, i can jump easily, rite??

4) opportunity costs - i cant be waiting n waiting n waiting. whichever job i go to, there will be uncertainties. so now since there's an opportunity to finally get started, y not? virtually there's no other options at the mmt. so no need 钻牛角尖 le. jus go ahead.

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yep. that's y i decided to juz start n see how. i know im frm bnf and it is definitely not the most commonsensical choice to go into a totally diff field. but then... i was talking to yl tt day and somehow, she popped me this question - "y did u choose bnf then?" .. tt question kind of woke me up. yes.. y did i choose bnf at the end of 1st yr?? i chose bnf, not bcuz l like bnf, but becuz bnf will open me up to more options. if i choose hr or mkting, it will be diff to go into bnf sector. but for bnf, it's easier to enter the hr n mkting field. n tt was y i chose bnf at tt pt of time. in fact, i also don know y i chose business in the v 1st place. i only knew i didnt want engineering cuz i had enuff of physics n chem. i didnt wat sci fac cuz at the end of it, most prob i can only teach. i din wanna go arts n soci, cuz like nothing interests me in there. im not gd enuff for law, medicine or dentistry. and so, tt left me with business and tt's how i ended up being a business grad. if i can start all over again, maybe i'll choose mass comm . y din i choose it back then? cuz i din even know there's something known as mass comm! ok.. best..

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and.. yah.. i don see y i should bound myself within the bnf sector nw. i don see y i shld do somthing simply because it's related to my degree. in the v 1st place, i chose bnf cuz i can have more options, not cuz i knew i wanna work in bnf sector. so y now, after 2 years, i insist on working in a bank? it's like.. my vision was blurred along the way. somehow, i trapped myself. or rather, i had allow my degree to trap me, to narrow my mind, and blocked my vision.
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我一直都在钻牛角尖...一直都过于执著.一路上我忘了自己要的..被周围的一切影响了. yah..i shouldnt insist. wad for? i wanna work in a bank cuz it pays well and it's related to my studies and it's more prestigious. but now this job also meet my expectations ma. and like i say, i should not trap myself becuz of my degree. and prestige? if have, of cuz gd la. if don have, also nvm la. more impt is the tangible remuneration and benefits. tt's more practical. and somemore, not tt i din try the banks ma. i applied le, but somehow like no news ma. so i think i shld juz move on. if i like it, then gd for me. if not, i can always jump. juz try out 1st lor. grab whatever opportunities tt come along. you'll never know wad's in store for you. half a yr. more than enuff to know if i like the job. if by then i don like, then jump lor. no prob de, rite?? yepp.. tt's it then!

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but then.. my working hours are totally diff frm the norms. i have to fit in tuitions, family, hubb and frenz. really abit tough.. i don know how it will go.. but .. well .. frens.. if in future, wanna meet, i think u guys will have to accomodate me abit le. most prob i can only make it on monday nite or sunday nite. all other days cmi le. yepp.. juz see how ba.

FyP GroUp OuTinG

ok.. and as usual.. im not sleeping when im really supposed to. all thanks to my com and internet connection. i started using the com at 11.30pm, thinking tt i've half an hr, juz enuff for me to finish blogging and to go to bed at 12am. but the com kept hanging and i had to keep restarting. when the com's finally working, the internet connection got cut off by itself suddenly. argh!!

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ok.. now it's 12.24am.. i wasted almost an hour. wad the... anyway, had dinner with my fyp prof and mates over @ fish n co @ the glass hse. pretty cool place. 1st time i ate there. got live singers there. and.. pls do not go to fish n co to celebrate ur bday cuz they'll make u wear a funny hat and stand on the chair and the crews will make a big hoo-haa.. then u'll have the whole restaurant looking at u. woo.. if ur an attention-seeker, then tt's fine. if not, it's really quite malu. we did it once for xh at the outlet in jp. but she was too paisay to stand on the chair anyway. hahah...

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had a great time chatting with them. prof kang's really a nice guy. the 1st impression he gave me was a serious man, "straight to the pt, no time to crap" tt kind. but as time goes, he's really a nice guy. he helped us sooo much in our fyp proj, making everything sooo easy for us. thank god we found him as our tutor. cant thank him enuff.

me n jovin... the famous 'tweeze' again... no other pose liao..

wayne's in white and prof kang's in blue..

apparently i should not pose this pic, cuz wayne's eyes r closed.. but... i don care! lol ..

ok... doing wayne a favour...

this was taken is prof's office. haha.. quite some time back.. did we change much???

yepp.. tt's all the pics i have of them. fyp.. the majestic thing. completed. got an A. fantastic. all thanks to my fantastic grp mates - wayne n jovin.. and of cuz.. our fantastic tutor - prof eugene kang.. and of cuz... the fanstastic ME! yeahhhh!!! ****cheerz****

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yes... i juz knew i'll go crazy whenever im tired... yeah...

TiReD

i wanna blog so much... but im really tired... it's time to sleep.. i don wanna fight the urge to sleep during work again. it's too tough. do u know how painful it is when u wanna doze off so much but yet u cannot???? yes. tt feeling is horrible.scary. always told myself to slp early.. yet.. haii... i need to slp.. not thinking straight already... ZZZZZZZZZZZZZzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

DepReSsEd..

im back.. frm one of the worst interview i ever went to. yes.. worst.. i don wanna describe... it's just.. worst. i guess im over confident and too naive. it was a 2nd interview and it was with an hr executive. and if im not wrong, when tt hr exec called me to arrange for the 2nd interview, she was saying something like - "u've already met up with my manager, daniel......" ------- so, naturally i'll think tt the 1st interviewer is the superior while the 2nd interviewer is the subordinate, rite? and so, i assumed tt this really wasnt a 2nd interview. rather, the 1st interviewer already "approved me" and this time im there to know more abt the 'terms and conditions' with regards to the job. afterall, it was a hr person who's meeting me, ya? but o boy.. am i wrong! tt hr lady bombarded me with soo many questions. and they r tough and personal questions. gotta cite situations, give examples blah blah blah tt kind. and in the end.. i juz crapped my way thru and almost everything was "any-o-how-say" de.. best.. ok.. job d... gone, i think. and again, im demoralised.

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i think for the time being, i can forget abt getting into the banks. i applied to a number of them, but only a few came back. in fact, only 2 came back. and one of them, i already screwed the interview. ok..nvm.. i need to take a break frm all these. if this continues, i'll only be demoralising myself. i need something to spur me, not demoralise me. starting on g's the only option now. but then .. wed must see the contract how 1st. maybe there r terms inside which i cannot agree to. if g also don have le, then really bobian must start all over again le lor. so hopefully, the prospects and remuneration of g will be as gd as wad the interviewer told me tt day.

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frm no options, to some options, to now, no options again. life......it's ok. if nothing comes out of it, i'll juz ren4 ming4 and start the whole dumb process of search-send-wait-interview-wait. i wont die. yes i wont die.

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anyway, yesterday met up with jc mates - jennifer and may. and ya... we r supposed to wear dress according to jenny. went vivo 1st. ate, chatted and shopped. then dinnertime jenny and i wanted sushi.. but decided it was too ex. and tt's when i recommended them to tt jap restaurant which sell 99cents sushi. haha.. and so, we took bus all the way to novena and yep, had a hearty dinner.

me, jennifer and may

in carl's jr. tt guy behind.. abit 诡异 horr..

tt's may. i tot she looks like zhang huimei. :p

nihon mura. tt's the name.

ahh.. food..

in the restaurant..

after dinner may went off first and jenny and i were left to shop. first time went to this shopping arcade - square 2. went into this shop and i bought 2 sets of office wear. a blouse, a skirt and a formal dress. individually is quite cheap la. but sum up still quite a sum. heart pain. spent quite some time in tt shop and by the time we left tt shop, already 9 plus. many other shops already closed and cannot shop anymore le. and so we sat at the bus stop and chatted till 10.45pm. yep.

BuaY TaHaN

Wah kaoz... sometimes im really disgusted by pple who are so calculative.. 为了money撕破脸皮... kaoz.. abit of money only ma.. need to keep reminding ma? thru the phone, thru the sms... not sian one mehh?? not as if im not going to pay back rite? so gun cheong for wadd? buay tahan lar... arghhh...y so like tt ?? i really so not trustworthy meh?? owe a little money also must breathe down my neck mehh?? even if i don return, cannot juz take it tt the money is spent on a present for me meh?? cannot lar... pple are not tt nice and generous. yeah.. i know. 50 bucks means bloody alot. matter of life and death. and im being accused of being 不自动. woohoo.. tt's the last straw. 50 bucks juz to see a true someone! worth it!

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anyway... my dilemma's not solved yet. ok.. shall stop being mysterious.. basically there are a few options..

1) job a - can earn alot if got many clients. but it's too tough. i rejected already.

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2) job b - v interesting job. nothing to do with bnf. im v interested. but pay bloody low. i feel so insulted by the pay they are offering and i wonder how they can still manage to recruit degree holders. maybe some pple really go for interests and not money. but sorry, i need to eat and i need to provide for the family. i not so 幸福 till can go for 兴趣 and don care abt money. and i rejected. to think tt their office is in tanjong pagar.. haiii... disappointment..

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3) job c - familiar pple, familiar environment, super good superior (the immediate superior i mean, the higher up ones.. im not too sure.. ) my only concern is the pay. not low, but slightly lower than my expectation. hmmm.. i really don wanna appear to be money-faced. but then.. it's my 1st job after soooo many years. i really hope at the end of each month, i can give a decent amt to ma and pa. a few hundreds do make a diff. right?

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4) job d - local bank job. but apparently, i was not encouraged to take it cuz there's not much room for development. as in, if u take this position, then next time if u wanna jump to other areas in the banks, it's kidda hard. anyway, mon's 2nd interview. maybe they don even wan me. see how.

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5) job e - foreign bank job. job will expose me to many areas in the bank. im quite interested. but 1st interview's in early july. apparently, culture of the country in which tt bank originates, is a culture whereby they like to employ their own pple. own pple as in pple frm their own country. so if i get selected, there's not much room for advancement cuz if they wanna promote, they'll promote their own pple 1st. and if there's no own pple to promote, they'll recruit pple frm their home country to fill up the top positions. tt's wad i heard lar. so it's difficult for pple not frm their country to climb. but again, they mite not want me afterall.

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6) job f - tmr's the interview. interesting job. but i know if i tell any of u.. u guys will be "huh... sure ar..." ma's rather against it cuz she thinks it's a total waste of my education and it's not goin to be very very long-term. i tot so too. but.. it's a totally diff experience lorr.. shant say so much here. don even know if i'll make it. if i make it, then will talk more. if not, den it's ok. even the interview is a gd experience.

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7) job g - not related to bnf. gotta work both weekends for the 1st 4 mths, but got 2 weekdays off. working hours totally diff frm office jobs, so no need to sqz with pple during morning bus rides, lunch and evening bus rides when knock off. attractive pay. im fine with the job. and i agreed le. wed go down discuss contract.

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and now, the delimmas come. 1st) do i really want job g?? it's not related to wad i study in school leh! if let say after 1 yr, then i decided to change job, it will be hard for me to get back into the banking industry. by then, though i already started working for a while, i'll only receive the pay of a fresh grad cuz i got no prior experience. can u imagine? after 5 years i change job. change to one in the banking industry but i only get the pay of a fresh grad. diao... and.. it's a private company. it's a service co. as in, if there's no demand for the service, then wont the co go bust? is it safe/stable to work there? wad if they gotta closed down? hmmm.. all these i gotta discuss when i go down sign the contract. 2nd) job g wanna me to give them a reply by yesterday. but i still got jobs d, e, f ma... wad if d, e or f wants me and they can offer me even better terms? then i'll regret de worr.. so.. those r the dilemmas lor.. anyway, wed then go down sign contract ma. by then, i shld more or less know if d and f wants me. if they want me, then i consider again lor. if not, then i'll sign with g? then work 1st lor. then i'll go for e's interview. and if e's better, i'll juz quit g and jump. but also depends la. maybe i'll love g? haii.. so many uncertainties.. tt's y im sooo sian.

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actually i know it shouldnt be like tt. once i accepted g, i should juz go ahead and should not even go for other interviews and open myself to more options. 做人不是看到更好的就去更好的那里. i know i shouldnt be so mean. hang on to g, yet at the same time looking for something better and dump g when i really get something better. but human beings are fickle and greedy, arent they? aiyer.. i don know lar.. the interviews, i'll juz go. since there's a chance, y not? it's gd experience anyway. they mite not even want me. wait till they want me, then i worry again ba. but then again, if i already settle on g, why look for more trouble by goin to the interviews? if i really get selected, wouldn i be giving myself headache again? arghH!

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and tt's not all. i blogged earlier saying how worried and reluctant im to go work in a bank. now, i have g, which is totally not related to banks, yet im also worried! it's so ironic lar.. huiping ar huiping... u said u don wanna work in a bank cuz ur so dead scared.. but now tt ur not goin into a bank, ur worried tt ur degree will go to a waste.. wad the hell are u thinking abt????? can u be more decisive and know exactly which way u wanna go? go to banking and finance related也不是. 不去也不是. wad do u wan exactly??????

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tt's the prob. i don know. i want work in banks cuz it's prestigous and related to wad i study and the pay should be gd. yet im so scared and stressed. the life there is stressful and mundane. i don wanna look like 45 when im only 25. but then, if don even try, how would i know? if now i don try, then when? maybe i totally love to work in banks? maybe when im 45, i'll still look like 25? maybe it's not so stressful and mundane afterall?

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apparently g and other jobs out of bnf industry seemed less stress and less mundane. but it's not related to wad i study! u get wad i mean? i feel tt if i don go to banks cuz im scare, then im not even giving myself a chance. a chance to try out the banks. argh..i hate this. ok.. im too confused already.. never mind. juz see how. interviews still go. if got options then decide again. if not, g'll be the choice. july coming. this cannot drag on. and i don wanna go thru tt terrible process of send resumes-1st interview-2nd interview. im too tired and sian for tt. i'll juz start on g. maybe i'll like it soo much. u neber know. everything's a uncertainty now.

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shall end with a meaningful quote i came up with myself : when u don know where to start, everywhere's a starting point. yes.. 我是有墨水的. don praise me lest my face turns red. thx.

GroWiNg Up!

today took half day off.. cuz got interview.. and cuz of tt, i gotta eat lunch alone. and i did! miss wu actually ate alone in the foodcourt! woohoo! great improvements!in the past, there is no way i can sit alone in a place and eat. i'll feel so conscious and weird. as if everybody's looking @ me and thinking how pathetic im to eat alone. i'll tabao or worse come worse, not eat or juz take finger food. but now i did it! im so proud. it started off with eating alone in fast-food restaurants, then to "not-so-many-pple" de foodcourt/hawker, and now, in orchard road, i can also! yea!! i can feel myself maturing and really growing up! yea yea yea! im proud! i love growing up! and i hope, when it comes to matters of the heart, i can also be more mature and steady. then maybe hubb will suffer less? hahah.. i love growing up! i recalled myself as a kid. always a scaredy cat.. spellings cannot memorize will cry... forgot to bring books to school will panic... don know how to do hw will cry... im so glad i've grown up. being a kid is pathetic!

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so much as i said i've matured, i still cannot be decisive. there r many dilemmas now. too many choices.. too many options... kidda lost.. how?? i guess no one can help me or decide for me. it's really up to me. i gotta make a choice and once i made it, i gotta go ahead with it. there's no turning back, i cannot regret or blame anyone cuz it's a decision tt i made. yes.. heavy responsibility. think huiping, think! it's not a matter of life and death. but.. pls make a prudent choice!

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hahah.. i v mysterious eh? many things lar.. but too long to blog. and im too tired to blog.. i shall make up my mind, SOON.

Hmmm

Finally one day where i came home straight after work. past few days been going out.. now finally can come home le.. haha.. say till like wad like tt.. anyway, today supposed to have tuition, but tt person called and changed to tmr. boo.. ma said tmr she'll cook feast cuz of dumpling festival and told me to come home for dinner. but now got tuition.. sian.. can only eat leftovers le..

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hmm i think working will really make me gain weight. always eating and not exercising. at home, usu i wake up at ard 10am. then eat breakfast. usu in the morning, juz wake up, not tt hungry de. so breakfast usu cannot finish all de. so i will leave for afternn. and ard 2pm, i'll finish all up. then wait till dinner time and eat again. working is diff lor. cuz u wake up early ma, so by 10am, already v hungry. so must eat something. then within 2 or 3 hrs, u'll go for lunch. cuz cannot eat half and save for later, and don wanna waste food, u tend to finish all. then ard 4pm, snack abit again. then reached home, abt 7pm, eat again. see the impact? eat eat n eat.. working makes one fat!

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n today pa bought durians home. so v v nice of him. yesterday @ geyland i suggested eating but cuz we were all too full, in the end we din eat any. and so today he specially bought durians home for me to eat. soooo nice of him!

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and now im addicted to this sammi cheng's new song - 她们说. darn good. her singing darn power. i love her!

HaPpY PaPa DaY!

it's fathers' day! woohoo.. went to this seafood restuarant in geylang to celebrate. bro treated. sis treated during mothers' day and now bro treated.. when can it be my turn? hopefully can get employed soon then can give them all a gd treat. food there not bad.. got my favorite tian2 ji1. yummy!

Star of the day! The shirt tt pa's wearing.. i bought de. cool huh!

the signboard..

yummy!

papa n mama

papa n me!

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on the way there, saw some "not-s0-decent" ladies on the street. hmmmm... jus some tot.. i think they really can earn alot. assuming they charge 50 bucks per customer. one day 5 customers. so one day can earn $250. 10 days can earn $2500. one month can earn $7500. woah. and tt is conservative estimation lor. one day cfm more than 5 customers. so one month, can easily earn > 10k ? hmmm... better than being a manager huh.. professor in sch also mite not earn tt much..wad's the pt of studying so hard then???

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DISCLAIMER: ABOVE COMMENT IS A MERE THOUGHT OUT OF CURIOSITY. PLS IN NO WAY BE AFFECTED/TEMPTED BY THE NUMBERS BROUGHT FORWARD! IT'S EASY MONEY. BUT NOT FOR US!

HecTic

as anticipated.. the week's gonna be a happening one. and yep. it was great. everyday sleeping late and waking up early.. omg.. real bad for health. lemme hurry finish blogging then can go slp le! heeh..

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on wed went jb with hubb. seriously, the thing there really much cheaper. rem how i complained abt the passport pics? 4 pics for 8 bucks? over at jb, i took 12 of them at ringgit 22, which is abt sgd10. and it came with a cd-rom so i can upload the pic onto com! in sing, one pic costs $2. over there, one pic costs <$1. incredible huh? but recently, with all the negative news on jb.. i think for the time being better avoid. hmm.. but i find there ok lei.. nothing dangerous lei.. but then again.. u'll never know.. anyway, tt day bought some groceries and a pair of black heels. needed it for interview.. only sgd18.. cheap! had a great day there.

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on thurs started working. glad to be back and earning money. though not much but better than slacking @ home and wasting time. after work went meet up with ntu gang. went kenny rogers @ marina to eat and chat.

treasures frm ntu. frm left: yingying, yinghan, joanne, qiuyan

prim and proper..... wait till u see the next and next next pics...

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pls be prepared and do not be shocked..

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5 nutcracks!!!! omg.. i cant believe we did this in the restaurant! and the award definitely goes to joanne.. totally huo1 chu2 qu2 le ! good effort to yinghan too...

supposed to be "act innocent". but apparently... erm.. ying fits the bill most..

we r such posers, arent we?? actually im not... but... they forced me into doing it.. i din wanna to!!!

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on friday i went for an interview. tt bloody interviwer made me waited for a damn gd 2 hrs! can u believe it?? wth lorr.. stupid cocky guy.. when i arrived, there were 2 person waiting already. after i finished filling in the form, one was already done, and the other waiting. so me and tt person waited. we waited sooo long, b4 she was finally called in. so left me. and i waited.. waited.. and waited.. till another 5 person came in and we all waited together. tt gal b4 me had long left, but i don know y the interviewer still did not call me in. i was complaining to this smu gal tt i had waited for 2 hrs blah blah blah when it was finally my turn. the interview only took a while and when i walked out.. im dead pissed to know tt the smu gal was immediately next. she didn't have to wait tt long !!! to think tt i had complained to her abt how long the waiting time was. she must be thinking tt im such a pathetic ass! argh! stupid guy!!! wasted my time $#*%&*$#)(*$( * i bet he must be busy doing other stuff while happily making us wait! kaoz.....
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anyway, after tt went to meet shimin and wanling. went to this jap restaurant @ shaw towers. had a great meal. yummy. after tt went cafe cartel to relax and chat. nice..

looks real gd, isn't it?

tt's wanling. if u still remember her, she's the organiser of my 21st bday!

tt's shimin. the co-organiser??

yep.. 2 of my most dearest frens. next yr'll our 10th year of friendship. how many 10 yrs can one have? ok, shant be emotional/sentimental. anyway, these few days been going out and spending and spending and spending. diaoo.... big hole in pocket liao.. or rather, a bigger hole in pocket. jialek!!

LooKinG FoRwArD

this week's gonna be a fruitful week. today already tues. got 2 interviews later on. wed planning to go out with hubb. maybe to jb. then at night gotta go tanjong pagar. been invited to go listen to a seminar then do a survey after tt. but the main thing is, i'll get 20 bucks after tt! hahah.. hubb and me 2 person go will have $40 bucks. yea~ then after the survey thingie, meeting up with a buyer to sell my old books. can earn another $15. hee.. hopefully the rest of the books can sell off too..

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thurs and fri and the following 2 weeks i'll be working at the old co tt i'd always worked. looking forward.. finally can earn some money while looking for a perm job. else i really feel like a thrash at home. but if go work, then how to send resumes and go interviews? anyway, my supervisor said he'll make the necessary arrangements if i need to go off. hehe.. so shld be ok ba.. finally some income!! happy! nice pple, familiar environment, no stress, no politics, easy job (data-entry).. if only i can do part-time forever...

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thurs will be meeting up with the marketing gang. yea. hmm.. the last time we met was during cny period. so it's like 3mths? hehe.. then fri will be meeting up with xxg. been sooooo long since i last met them. cool. can gossip till siao liao. supposed to meet for whole day de.. but with my work, now can only meet for dinner. boo.. but then... money really more impt worr.. esp in times like this.

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looking 4ward!!!

StaRT!

alrite.. it's the start of a new week. gotta be back in mood again. wad mood? "sending resumes and going for interviews" mood lar! the whole process.... gotta start all over again. ok.. i should be positive!! YEAH!

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the morning started off quite ok. got a call early in the morning to ask me go for interview. lol~.. finally not some sales job le. or issit? not sure.. havent double chk the job description. time to do some hw. i realised.. after 2 yrs in banking and finance, im still not sure wad banking and finance is all abt! so, im really kidda worried abt the interview tmr. actually.. hmm.. how should i put it.. like.. u knoe, when i read those job descriptions that is related to banking and finance, i get so turned off. not turned off, but maybe.. scared?? i don know why. i graduated with a deg in banking and finance, yet when i come across job descriptions related to banking and finance, i get worried and im reluctant to apply. such an irony huh. really don know wad was i doing in ntu. half-bucket water!

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i guess i know y afterall. cuz im a grad in bnf. pple will expect me to be very well-versed in bnf. and if im not, pple will definitely condemn me like hell. unlike, say for eg, a grad in mass comm. if he/she doesnt know alot in bnf, pple will teach and coach him/her, cuz they do not expect him/her to know alot. the threshold is much higher. tt's y i so scare la.. u know.. im half-bucket water ma. if really go into bnf field, pple sure expect me to know this know tt and their tolerance level for me will be low. so i really worried lor. so much for wad i wrote in my cover letter and resume. all bullshit!

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anyway, shall c how things go. maybe, juz maybe, i'll not go into bnf related fields also. afterall, how many pple really do wad they study?? yep.. i shall juz wait and see wad life has in store for me!let the chapter begins!!

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o, b4 tt magical ending, i wanna complain abt how things are getting more and more ex in sing!! sing is an unbearable place to live in!!! yesterday went took passport size photos. 4 pics for 8 bucks! wahh.. one pic is like 2 bucks?? worse still, it was damnnnn uglee lar.. tt woman.. cmi lar! send in for job applications sure kenna rejected. bobian, i went to another shop to take again. this time is 4 pics for 7 bucks. 1 buck cheaper cuz they not using digital camera, is those old camera, one shot settle, cannot choose. lucky it came out ok. much much better than the 1st attempt. buay tahan.. and there goes my 15bucks! y send in resumes also need pics?? tot frm young we r taught not to judge pple by the looks?? why pple never carry out wad they preach?? this is an uglee and materialistic world!!

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and tt day, went food court with mum. she ordered one coffee and i ordered one can of soft drink. totalled up to $2.50! wahh... $2.50??! ex lorr.. life in singapore in getting really unbearable. really cannot blame me for always going jb to shop and boost their economy and harm our own. v diff to live in singapore liao.. haii..

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ok.. shall stop sounding like a grumpy cheapo auntie. back to my magical ending - "let the chapter begins!"

SaLes, SaLeS anD MoRe SaLeS!

ok.. i know gss is on, but... 此 sales 非彼 sales. haha.. chim? anyway, the "sales" tt appeared 3 times in my heading is not referring to the "sales" as in "great summer sales". rather, im referring to the "sales" jobs tt id been going interviews for! ok.. y am i making a simple thing sound so complicated??

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anyway, i don know y. sent out many resumes. but those who got back are those sales jobs. u know, the kind i mentioned in my last entry?? why?? why?? why?????????? y only tt industry actively looking for pple? y only tt industry gimme chance? y only tt industry respond to me?

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i'd finally flipped thru the recruit section of the sat's papers. ok. many many job opportunities. i singled out a number too. gotta start the whole damn process of sending out resumes again. wish me luck.

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result was out on fri. amazingly i did not fail 308!!!! hahha.. i really find ntu's results v weird. or rather, my results v weird. whenever i tot i cmi, i will make it. whenever i tot i will do well, i did only barely. weird. anyway, overall was not as bad as i'd always worried. but of cuz, not as good as i had wished for. erm.. v chim again hor?

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everyting 已尘埃落定. i've got the key to enter the "society door" le. 接下来的路得自己走了. previously been too down to blog anything. too demoralised and erm.. 消沉. i think it's time to 振作. time to move on with life. result was not as bad as i worried. ok, it's bad on a general scale. but there's nothing i can do also rite? everything's already cfm. nothing more to worry abt. all i need now is a job. once i get one, i will knoe where i wanna head and i will go all out to achieve. i must be back to who im and not let any other things affect me. i can, i will and i must.

No OuTcOmE

went for an interview today. everything was gd until the lady told me tt wad i wrote as my expected pay was too high for a fresh grad with no experience. they asked me wad was my threshold. i said a figure which in fact was lower than my threshold. too pressurizing and there was no way i "dare" to say my true threshold. anyway, they said they'll call me up by this week if im selected for a 2nd interview. if they call, im gonna tell them my true threshold. and if they cannot agree, then jiu suan le ba.

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anyway, i cant deny tt im disappointed. am i really asking for too much? am i really worth so little in the eyes of the employers?

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and the last thing i need now, is pple telling me how much higher i should go for and not settle for those "low-paying" jobs. who don know i should go higher? who don know i should aim higher? who don know i should apply for big companies and big banks? but, are pple willing to gimme a chance? it's not as if im not doing anything rite? but it takes 2 hands to clap. i took the step, but the employers must take the step too, rite? will pple stop making everything sound soo simple? i have no bargaining power @ all! who am i to tell the employers tt "hey c'mon, i'm worth more than $xxxx, if u cannot offer me $yyyy, then pls don waste my time!".. come on lor.. u expect me to say tt to the employers issit? simpleton and naivety!

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i feel there are many ways to encourage pple. but telling me such things when im already feeling so down will only make me feel worse. i hope in this world, pple can be more sensitive and mature. think b4 one talk. put yourself in the situation, b4 u comment.

SpErM

each time after ejaculation, millions of sperm will swim towards the egg. when they reach the egg, they will surround the egg. ultimately, only one lucky sperm gets to enter and fertilise the egg.

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why am i feeling exactly like a sperm now?

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tons of pple fighting for one job. will i be tt lucky person who gets the job?

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i don know y.. but im getting really demoralised. i'd sent out so many resumes. but so far, only 4 called me in for interviews. 4 may sound alot.. but considering the number of resumes i sent out.. 4 is like don know how many percent only lor. and those who called are not really the ones i wanna. haii.. y issit so hard? this is soooo darn sian!! write resumes, send resumes, wait for them to ask u go for interviews, go interviews, sometimes still need 2nd round interviews, then wait for their appointment, then consider pay and benefits, then finally both sides agree on the job applications. why must everything follow a procedure?? can i skip all the steps and jump to the final stage? the route to getting a perm job is sooo long and tedious! i hate all these!!

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on sat, a co called me up for interview. 2pm. rather last min, but i still went since i was free and rather near my hse. i was wondering y they worked on sat afternn. anyway, i went and.. totally felt cheated! it was not really a interview, more like a carrer presentation! so many pple were there lorr!! i was like .... diaoo!! y did they cheat me into goin??! they din told me it was like tt de lor. i din expect it at all! and i guess, other pple were also cheated into goin cuz another gal told me tt she din expected it to be like tt also! wad the... and.. it was AIA lorrr. on the recruit ad, they din mention they are an agency under AIA and the job description was soo brief and tt was y i decided to apply and try.

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anyway, i told them i gotta leave early, and yes, i got an interview frm the district manager. it was a financial consultant position. u know, tt kind where u have to build client base, then hopefully they sign with u, then u can earn the commission?? the kind of job i defined as "人见人怕" job?? cuz pple see u, they will know u wanna persuade them to sign this sign tt. tt's y 人见人怕.

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anyway tt guy was saying how attractive the job can be and how much money tt job can fetch me. i know wad he said is true lar. this kind of job can earn alot de. unlike those desk-bound jobs where the earnings are fixed, this kind of jobs can have unlimited earnings - provided u can coax pple into buying wad ur recommending. simple as it mite be. but.. pls lorr.. 1st, how to find clients? 2nd, how to coax pple into buying?? i really hate to hard-sell lor. keep pestering pple to buy buy buy.. it's not my style!!! i hate to keep pestering pple to change their minds!

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but then again.. now i got no jobs offers lei. and tt guy.. he made everything sound soo simple and attractive (no wonder he can be so successful! know how to talk so well!!).. maybe, juz maybe, i will consider. afterall, all my dear frens out there will support me de rite??? each help me sign abit, not too difficult de, rite?????????? esp those who r reading now, u guys are my best supporters ................................ rite?????????????????????????? hehehehehhehehe...guess next time i jio pple out, no one dares to come out le. boohoo~

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totally sian.. im really really sick of looking thru the jobs and sending resumes. think i'll stop at the time being and juz wait for calls. next wk then continue searching again. no pt making my morale soo low. everyday search, search, search, sent, sent, sent, but pple who called back are so few. i shall juz wait and hopefully more will call me in for interviews.

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when one is low, everything seemed so irritating. streetdirectory.com couldnt help me with the places i wanna find. my com's giving me prob. even dad's singing made me felt irritated. luckily he went sleep and stopped singing le. now the house so quiet.. finally.. and at low times like this, relishing the happy times in hk and tp made me feel sad. ultra sad. i don even dare blog abt my tp trip, cuz i don wanna see the photos and make myself sad. juz now on msn was talking to yingying. she was saying something like at least i got to go overseas. but then.. sometimes i hoped i din went hk and tp. then i wont have those happy memories. then i wont compare those happy memories with the sucky time im having now. then i wont feel soo bad. yep. maybe i shouldnt have went and made myself so happy. i know there is no logic in wad i am saying. but ... haii.. i guess im juz suffering frm depression. again. juz lemme indulge in my own sadness. let me roam in my own pathetic world.

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o.. and HAPPY BIRTHDAY BRO!

MayDaY CoNcErT

yesterday went watch mayday's concert with sis, bro-in-law, and hubb. hehe.. not too bad. quite high. but we were rather far away, so din really "high to the max". the concert was at max pavilion. 1st time there. hmm.. not as big as indoor stadium and the seats were those normal chairs, not those carpeted seats.

sista and me!

me, bro-in-law, and sista

tweeze??!

b4 the concert starts..

during the concert. pple in front damn high.. all stood up liao..

erm.. tt's guai4 shou4 i think

guan4 you4

i guess different artistes got different styles when conducting concerts. some like to play ard with costumes, some like to dance. as for mayday, hmm.. no costumes to talk abt lei.. they wore only t-shirts. and no dance also. maybe cuz they are a band. can play own music already v li hai? hmm.. i wanna watch sammi cheng's concert. watched once on tv... think she's really good. can sing, can dance, got costume parade. shiok! if she comes, hopefully i can afford the most ex tix and sit rite in front! cool!

after the concert we went supper @ east coast mac b4 bro-in-law drove us home.. woo.. fat...

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on wed went accompany ma for doc's appt. after tt met sis and bro-in-law for lunch. went to this newly opened jap restaurant @ revenue house. tv kept having the advertisment and the things there like v cheap, so we decided to explore that place.

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at revenue house, where i had my intern. been one yr le... which means 1 yr i neber go there le. time flies.. the coffeeshop changed le. the pretty coffee lady also not there when i went there. anyway, the restaurant's rite beside the coffeeshop. 2nd level. nice environment. the sushi on the conveyor belt costs only $0.99 per plate. much cheaper than those outside. and got a wide variety of food also. got bbq food, ramen, don, udon, and many many others. see when got gathering can go there. but then revenue house.. rather ulu lar.. i guess tt's y they can offer at such low prices. if open in shopping malls, think they cannot price their pdts so low le. cost leadership strategy? lol.. then u dont order thru the staff de. rather, u go and walk ard and see wad u like to eat. then u have to take the ice-cream stick tt represents tt food and bring back to ur table. then u juz place ur ice-cream sticks into the holder and someone will come collect the sticks and ur food will come soon. interesting eh? juz walk ard and come back with ice-cream sticks. haa.. next time can recommend tt place. revenue house, 2nd level. nearest mrt, novena.

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after tt lunch, went home and at nite met up with cousiee mich. cousins for soo many years, but this is like the 1st time we 2 went out alone??! when we were young, there used to be family outings. i remembered we used to go genting too. 2 times, i think? hahha.. but as we grow up, no more such family outings le lei.. only cny then we got to meet. we were frm the same sec sch, and same cca in sec sch. used to write letters de.. haha... but as we grow up, letters also stopped le. anyway, unlike my sis and another elder cousin who are v v close esp in their teenage years, me and cousin mich werent tt close. but this is a gd start. hehee.. went eat cafe cartel then went shopped ard ps. great time! see when u free jio me out again yo, cousin mich! hope next time i meet u, it'll be after my work and not come out frm home. ** pray**