summary of my maternity leave
1) the 1st 2 days when rayous first came home were really the toughest period. he woke up almost every hour wanting to be fed! by the time u feed him and burp him, half hour is gone. which means in another half hour time, he will wake up again! it really was nightmare! i practically did not sleep at all! that's so wrong for confinement period when i should get the maximum rest!!
initially did not want to leave him to sleep w the confinement nanny, but then, it just makes no sense that i cannot sleep at night while the nanny slept like a log! so in the end, decided to let rayous sleep w her and that's when i finally get to have some rest. haha.
now that i think back, im really appreciative of the nanny's help. lucky she was around.
2) after the nanny is gone, the original plan was to spend the maternity period at mum's place. however, due to the many circumstances, in the end, most of the time, i was at home myself w rayous.
right after the nanny left, hubb had to go back to reservist. so, cant go to mum's place when there's no one driving me there. so for the 1st week after the nanny left, i was at home with rayous. and on some nights when hubb cannot book out or had to book back in at night, i was alone w rayous throughout the night!
honestly, i also din know i could manage that. being alone w a baby throughout the day and night. haha. it's true that u will uncover the many hidden strengths u have when u become a mother!!
and then by the time hubb completed his reservist, i realised i actually can cope on my own! and that time was lunar seventh period, so not advisable to bring rayous out and bring him back at night. so again, din go to mum's place.
and when lunar seventh is finally over, came the terrible and sickening haze! so again, cant go out to mum's place again.
so as a result..... i was at home handling rayous all by myself most of the time.
3) the most difficult period was when the nanny 1st left. having to wake up in the middle of the night to prepare the milk for a crying baby is NO fun stuff at all!! warm the milk, wait for him to feed, burp, change diaper, pump milk ... all in all will take 1hr plus especially if he's taking a lonnnng time to drink the milk. by the time i can go back to sleep, he's almost time for the next feed again!!! OMG!
4) things only got better when i realised that i can actually let him latched on me if he wakes up in the middle of the night. i think it just happened on one night when i was sooo tired that i din bother to wake up and warm the milk but just let him latch on while i lie down and half asleep. then i realised eh, actually can work leh. haha. and since then, ive been doing so! no need to let him cry like mad while waiting for the milk to warm up, no need to pump milk! hahahah. and i also dont bother to change his diaper in the middle of the night liao. so all in all, only need about 20mins and i can go back to sleep liao! and maybe cuz now he's older, he doesnt wake up as often in the middle of the night liao. heng ah!
5) the benefits of letting him latched on are that i dont have to pump out the milk and also dont need to wash and sterilised the equipment. but cons is that we wont know how much he'd drank. and it seems that he gets hungry faster when he was fed via latching on. so now, day time i will let him latch on, but night time will feed him via bottles, so that he can sleep longer.
but recently, he seemed to prefer latching on to feeding via bottles (thats but of cuz, nothing beats sucking at mummy's busts, always right temperature, always right volume!) he will kick up a big fuss halfway through the bottle feeding but when the bust is offered, he'll happily take it. so... now will have to let him drink more from bottle and less on latching liao, else my mother in law will have a hard time feeding him when im back to work.
6) at the beginning, i will cook lunch for myself using the multi-cooker. but now most of the days, i will just survive on bread and biscuits, milk and coffee for lunch. ok.. no breakfast, cuz usually, by the time i really wake up for the day, will be around 11am liao. LOL.
7) it's always said that when the baby sleeps, the caregiver should also sleep. but for rayous, he doesnt really sleep for long. at most he will only sleep for an hour and wake up. so... instead of sleeping and kenna waken up by him, i'd rather not sleep at all. haii. if only he's that kind of babies who can sleep for 3, 4 hours straight in the day... then perhaps i can have more rest during the day. also, when he sleeps, it's the best time for me to do my own stuff. so tell me, how to sleep when he sleeps??
8) though no need to work, staying home whole day with no one else but a baby is also quite a sad thing. i look like a wretch, w oily face and messy hair and auntish clothes, babbling to a baby. OMG! to put it simply, it's a total lost of myself!
i do look forward to weekends when hubb is around and we can go out and i can have a breather and interact with the outside world.
i contemplated the idea of bringing rayous out myself to malls and shop or to dine. i even bought a haversack so that i can carry his baby stuff at the back, while i carry him in a sling in front. but sadly, i never did accomplish that. i just cant imagine what will happen if im only halfway through my meal and he started crying. should i just continue to eat while he cries?? or should i breastfeed him in public with no one helping me? or should i stand and walk around in the restaurant to pacify him? or should i just pay for the unfinished meal and leave the restaurant? or what if he started crying on the public transport???? and he's getting heavy. i think it will kill me if i carry a bag at my back and then carry him in a sling in front.
wait till he can sit in that baby carrier (which i think should be easier to handle than a sling) that we have for him and wait till he's more stable bah. hopefully then, i will have the courage to bring him out alone.
so.. on one hand, i dread going back to work. but on the other, i do look forward to putting on make-up, putting on perfume, wear back those killer heels, carry the designer bags, looking good and suave. LOL
so now, if you ask me if im ok to be a stay-home mum, i will say no.
stay-home tai tai, yes. but definitely not a stay-home mum.
9) and of cuz, with our new roles as mum and dad, there are bound to be conflicts as we assume the new roles. most of the time it will be me complaining that he doesnt help me enough, doesnt take care of us enough, always coming home late.... i have so much unhappiness and complains that he said im suffering from post-natal depression! WTH.
anyway, still alot for us to explore and learn together. jiayou bah!
10) good milk flow which is a very lucky thing (though there are problems associated with too good milk flow too!). i dont know, but somehow, i would like to credit that to the papaya fish soup that thomson medical offers. we bought a few tubs back also. i just have a feeling that it was those soups that helped established my milk flow.
so i tot all will be doom after the nanny left... but.. im still alive and kicking!! actually not so difficult and scary afterall lahh! i really am impressed with myself. being able to take care of another human being all by myself (most of the time). a big pat on my shoulder. im one strong woman!!! yeahhh!!!
will definitely definitely miss this period of time =)
oh, and just to update. during this 4months, it was really the only period which i know what shows are showing on tv and get to watch some episodes. during these 4 months, the serials were 我们的家园, 吻我吧住家男, 手牵手 and now 起飞. some of the variety shows were 歌台星力量, 校园美魔王. hohohoho
oh, and just to update. during this 4months, it was really the only period which i know what shows are showing on tv and get to watch some episodes. during these 4 months, the serials were 我们的家园, 吻我吧住家男, 手牵手 and now 起飞. some of the variety shows were 歌台星力量, 校园美魔王. hohohoho
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