BowLing TiMe

went bowling with gals on friday nite. for all these years we've known each other, this is like the 1st time that we bowled together. lol. been a long time since i last bowled and now my arm is still hurting after the exercise. keke..

~ @ marina sq super bowl ~

~ our scores for the 1st match. yy was highly ostracised by us cuz though claiming it's her 2nd bowling experience, she came in 1st out of the 5 of us!!! ~

~ 2nd round scores. glo came in 1st this time round. really croutching tiger hidden dragon. i was 2nd in both games. also not too bad ya? kekek ~

~ us, with the little pressies that yy got for us ~

~ with yy ~

and..... when AA yy meets jo who's willing to do stunts with her.....

very zi-high, arent them?

kekeke...

On LeaVes

damnnn... why are my leaves ending sooo fast???? gotta go back to the sucky place tmr. wth! but luckily, it's TGIF! that's the reason y i love to take leaves in mid-week.

met up jen and may for dinner yesterday. dinner at rajah inn and coffee bean thereafter. had a good time ranting and chatting about the good old past. we are planning to give jjc a visit. hopefully soon.

*****

went for a jog this morning. then lunch with mum, miss cute, and neighbour at mouth restaurant chinatown and settled some banking matters after that.

had wanted to take some time and go visit old colleagues at ex-office, but decided i was really tooo tired to proceed and went home to slp instead.

2 days passed juz like that. mmmmmm..........

I DONT WANT TO GO BACK TO WORK!!!!!

SAVE ME SOMEBODY!!

i just need one person to tell me that he/she is happy with his/her job and i will believe that working can really be happy.

anyone, pls?

i'll be on leave tmr and day after. im freak freeeak freeeeaakkk SICK.

if u think u can enlighten me and make me a happier person, do ask me out.

I DO NEED TO SCREAMMMMMM!

GaThEriNgs

met up with dear gals last thurs at illuma. went to this restaurant - chef daniel's kitchen - per ah yan's suggestion. not a bad place with live singing. the set dinner's at $28 nett with soup, bread, main, and dessert.

~ the pic which went a little lop-sided ~

~ yy and glo with the onion soupie ~

~ yan with her salmon and jo with her prawn linguini ~

~ us, the steak lovers. yum! ~

~ desserts! ice-cream on brownie ~

the restaurant may look abit atas, but the pricing is quite reasonable. after the card discount, think each of us paid only $23 for a full set dinner. and can enjoy the singing while sitting there and chat. nice one. :)

**************

met up with jc mates yesterday for dinner. and mr zh pang-sei us at the last min again. boo. dinner @ dans ryans chicago restaurant near tanglin mall, next to st regis hotel. bro used to work there N years ago. lol. 

quite a big restaurant with dim lighting. i will say the food is expensive. my salmon penne in cream sauce cost $20 while hubb's roasted chix with prawns cost $29. comes in big portion but not all that delicious. i couldnt even finish half of my pasta! sooo wasteful! had i known earlier that it's gonna be soo not appetizing, i would have gone for the grilled salmon. grrrr...

~ with jon, who is soo into fitness now and getting fitter and fitter by each day ~

~ bee and her husband, a doctor. dont play play... ~

after dinner was dessert time at island creamery. the ice cream they sell are home made. crowded but lucky for us, we managed to get a table for 5 of us.

the ice creams are really not bad. thick and creamy. then got exotic flavors like teh tarik, pulut hitam, horlick etc. one scoop i think $2+. our sundae with 2 scoops ice cream was $6+,  and bee's waffle's $7+ if i remb correctly.

finally the guys have also graduated. time to enter into the next phase of life liao. cool.

***********

i think till now, i havent post any pics of my new colleagues. this was taken on my welcome lunch at TCC abt 2 mths back. these are my immediate group mates.

lady in blue right in front is my team's head. the rest are my team mates. all married except the guy. some married with children, some not yet. yupp.

IM STILL SURVIVING!!!!

though not necessarily better.

ok, im a tee-wee bit better than the last post.. but not all that better... erm.. yah..  i sound chim, dont i?

in any case, i've tot about it. there is no decision as to stay or go. or rather, the decision is to stay, but with the intention to go anytime.

erm, chim again?

i've thoroughly analyse y im hating the job and there are 101 reasons. but on the other hand, all that 101 reasons simply boils down to one simple fact and tt is - the pay is far too low and does not commensurate with the amt of work i have to do now.

done alot of thinking recently. i used to be very comfortable with spending money and i often get the comment 'u very rich horrrr'. in actual fact, im not rich. but just tt my money was easy to earn. my latest knockoff time used to be 8pm sharp. i used to get my incentives. and when i think i need more money, i can easily supplement my income with more OTs (that will end at 8pm sharp!)

now? my money is super hard earned money!!! everyday, im uncertain abt my knockoff time and most of the times, i work later than i planned to. im uncertain of the amt of workload tt will come in for tt day. im uncertain of the kind of shit tt i will have to handle for tt day....

so, the absolute salary amount may be the same, but do not forget that salary should go hand-in-hand with workload. put it simply, if u are paid $100 for baking 1 cake, it's easy money, isint it? but wad if u are paid the same $100, but u have to bake 10 cakes?? get wad i mean??

i used to have a colleague in collections who said that for each day that he works, he is losing money. i probably understand wad he means now.

also, probably it's true that studying is better than working. ha.

basically, all human work for either of the 2 reasons: 1) money 2) passion. for the majority of us, sad to say, we work for 1). but rite now at this mmt, i have no money and no passion. so? conclusion?

in any case, i will still stay here until a trigger point that will make me throw the ltr. reasons for staying will only be to make my resume look better and to enhance my bargaining power. but if the trigger point has to come soon, then im prepared to go anytime.

i seriously deserve better. life is too short to be spent wallowing in self-pity. fridays are too precious to be spent crying. sundays are too short to go back to work.

and it's definitely not weak to quit just after a few months. the real weak thing is not daring to leave despite being unhappy.

opppsss.. must be offending the majority of mankinds!!

so, now is to work at best and wait and see. we'll see if the 'trigger point' comes earlier or the 'as time goes by' comes earlier.

UnhappY

i thought the worse was over. but alas, i was wrong. i hope im at the worse now. at least i wont fall further down and nothing awaits ahead, except being UP.

im sorry that u guys have to bear with this. seriously i think i would want to bash tt person up if all he/she blogs about is unhappiness at work, more unhappiness at work, and more unhappiness at work.

but i really do wish to document all these down so that in future, when memory fades, i still have something tat i can refer to, to remind myself how down i was b4.

so if u are already down, i suggest u to stop reading here and not lemme demoralise u further.

i know im weak, but i din know i can be this weak. im not afraid to admit tt i've cried for uncountable times over work. seriously, i don know wad has gotten into me that im sooo afraid.. soo unable to face everything tt is taking place. wad is happening to me?

probably i was in the shalala world of collections for too long. so long tt i can no longer adapt to the 'outside' world.

i know this is just the interim period and i will get used to it as time goes by. everyone tells me so. but, how long is the 'as time goes by' ???? half yr? one yr? 1.5 yrs? or .... never?

yesterday was the exact 3rd month. b4 i started on the new job, i told myself no MC and no leaves for the 1st 3mths. yet, both were not fulfilled. and the most funny thing was, out of the 3days leaves which i took, i went back to work for 1.5days.

get the picture?? i purposely took leaves to stop the new stuff from coming in so that i can have the time to clear the backlog. if u are a normal person, u must be 'WTH-ing' me now.

yes, im silly. but do i have a choice? i cant cope at all!! everything is in a big mess! and i took leaves so tt new stuff will not come in, my colleagues will cover me and help clear some of my pending stuff, and i can have time to clear my backlog.

seriously, i deemed that as an action of backing out. totally irresponsible of me to do that and leave my colleagues to cover me. but if i dont do that, things will just keep coming in and i will drowned. totally.

there was one day, sometime last wk, when the thought of tendering with immediate effect came to my mind. yes, things are soo bad that i even thought of just compensating and i can leave immediately w/o having to clear anything. i seriously hope i wasnt soo cool-headed as to think of the consequences and had just went ahead. too bad, i wasnt impulsive enough.

now, the very cool side of me is telling me to just F**K care, throw in the letter, serve 1 mth and byebye. then take a good break before starting again. y be soooo unhappy over something which i have a choice over????

but the very rationale side of me is telling me to hang on and be strong. to change my mindset, be brave and wait for the day when i can be used to everything and life will be easy thereafter. she is also reminding me of the agony of job-searching and not having income..

that's me. always indecisive. always not knowing wad to do. always ding-dong here, ding-dong there.

im unhappy. one side of me tells me to try. another side of me tells me to go.

??????????????????????????????

come 13aug will be my 3rd yr with the bank. i used to be v proud and satisfied to be working with tis bank. but... now... im no longer proud...im sick. terribly sick.

isit really time to go??

but if i were to go now, wad am i bringing with me?

would i be better off? or..... worse off?

Hubb's ConVocaTioN

my boy has finally officially graduated from school!!!

attended his convocation ytd. reminded me of the one i had 3yrs ago. time really flies. more or less the same as the one 3yrs back. calling names after names.. blah blahhh....

after the ceremony, we actually headed to elsewhere to have our pics taken. lol... relinquish the memories of me graduating!! the initial location was marina barrage, but the roads were blocked due to ndp rehearsals and we changed location to hort park. lol

the bear that should have been bought 3yrs ago. ahahahah.. each bear costs $58. tt probably explains y i did not buy it back then.

and hubb specially invested in a tripod stand so tt in future, we can take pics for ourselves. the 2 kuku us.. under the big hot sun.. wandering around in hortpark in our grad robes taking pics with our grad bears. :)

been 3yrs since i've grad. also meant 3yrs into the working society. things are not all that wonderful for me now. inital start-out was just to get a job and have some income. but now that it is no longer the initial start-out  period, perhaps it's really time to consider and plan the route ahead le?