SpErM

each time after ejaculation, millions of sperm will swim towards the egg. when they reach the egg, they will surround the egg. ultimately, only one lucky sperm gets to enter and fertilise the egg.

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why am i feeling exactly like a sperm now?

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tons of pple fighting for one job. will i be tt lucky person who gets the job?

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i don know y.. but im getting really demoralised. i'd sent out so many resumes. but so far, only 4 called me in for interviews. 4 may sound alot.. but considering the number of resumes i sent out.. 4 is like don know how many percent only lor. and those who called are not really the ones i wanna. haii.. y issit so hard? this is soooo darn sian!! write resumes, send resumes, wait for them to ask u go for interviews, go interviews, sometimes still need 2nd round interviews, then wait for their appointment, then consider pay and benefits, then finally both sides agree on the job applications. why must everything follow a procedure?? can i skip all the steps and jump to the final stage? the route to getting a perm job is sooo long and tedious! i hate all these!!

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on sat, a co called me up for interview. 2pm. rather last min, but i still went since i was free and rather near my hse. i was wondering y they worked on sat afternn. anyway, i went and.. totally felt cheated! it was not really a interview, more like a carrer presentation! so many pple were there lorr!! i was like .... diaoo!! y did they cheat me into goin??! they din told me it was like tt de lor. i din expect it at all! and i guess, other pple were also cheated into goin cuz another gal told me tt she din expected it to be like tt also! wad the... and.. it was AIA lorrr. on the recruit ad, they din mention they are an agency under AIA and the job description was soo brief and tt was y i decided to apply and try.

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anyway, i told them i gotta leave early, and yes, i got an interview frm the district manager. it was a financial consultant position. u know, tt kind where u have to build client base, then hopefully they sign with u, then u can earn the commission?? the kind of job i defined as "人见人怕" job?? cuz pple see u, they will know u wanna persuade them to sign this sign tt. tt's y 人见人怕.

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anyway tt guy was saying how attractive the job can be and how much money tt job can fetch me. i know wad he said is true lar. this kind of job can earn alot de. unlike those desk-bound jobs where the earnings are fixed, this kind of jobs can have unlimited earnings - provided u can coax pple into buying wad ur recommending. simple as it mite be. but.. pls lorr.. 1st, how to find clients? 2nd, how to coax pple into buying?? i really hate to hard-sell lor. keep pestering pple to buy buy buy.. it's not my style!!! i hate to keep pestering pple to change their minds!

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but then again.. now i got no jobs offers lei. and tt guy.. he made everything sound soo simple and attractive (no wonder he can be so successful! know how to talk so well!!).. maybe, juz maybe, i will consider. afterall, all my dear frens out there will support me de rite??? each help me sign abit, not too difficult de, rite?????????? esp those who r reading now, u guys are my best supporters ................................ rite?????????????????????????? hehehehehhehehe...guess next time i jio pple out, no one dares to come out le. boohoo~

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totally sian.. im really really sick of looking thru the jobs and sending resumes. think i'll stop at the time being and juz wait for calls. next wk then continue searching again. no pt making my morale soo low. everyday search, search, search, sent, sent, sent, but pple who called back are so few. i shall juz wait and hopefully more will call me in for interviews.

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when one is low, everything seemed so irritating. streetdirectory.com couldnt help me with the places i wanna find. my com's giving me prob. even dad's singing made me felt irritated. luckily he went sleep and stopped singing le. now the house so quiet.. finally.. and at low times like this, relishing the happy times in hk and tp made me feel sad. ultra sad. i don even dare blog abt my tp trip, cuz i don wanna see the photos and make myself sad. juz now on msn was talking to yingying. she was saying something like at least i got to go overseas. but then.. sometimes i hoped i din went hk and tp. then i wont have those happy memories. then i wont compare those happy memories with the sucky time im having now. then i wont feel soo bad. yep. maybe i shouldnt have went and made myself so happy. i know there is no logic in wad i am saying. but ... haii.. i guess im juz suffering frm depression. again. juz lemme indulge in my own sadness. let me roam in my own pathetic world.

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o.. and HAPPY BIRTHDAY BRO!